Big "BOB", not so big Bob

From Santa Monica: "The criminal complaint filed Monday accused Cruz, 48, of trying to hire David Carrington and David Walters -- homeless men who go by the street names Little Dave and Big Dave -- to murder Jennifer Campbell. It was not immediately clear which was Little Dave and which was Big Dave."

This story is funny/sad for so many reasons.

First, why would you hire homeless guys to put a hit on your wife? Those are the charges against Juan-Carlos Cruz, former celebrity chef. Did he buy into the stereotype of "homeless guys = thugs?" Doesn't he know that most homeless folks do the Right Thing.

Second, the reporter says it was not immediately clear who was Little Bob, and who was Big Bob. I'm just betting if you meet them together, you're gonna know. Either that, or they both should change to Medium Bob.

The story unravels when the cops bust Big Dave (or was it Little Dave?) for the crime of loitering. That means he was standing around and bothering someone. He said something sensible to the cops, like, "You guys should leave me alone, but get on this D-list celebrity for trying to hire me to murder his wife." Then Little Dave chips in, "Me too!"

Anyway, the cops put Big & Little Bobs into a cheap room, supplied them with some pizza and beer. And the chef is arrested.

Not doing the crime pays. Most homeless people got that.